Settling in

Ahh – kids are in bed, kitchen is cleaned up – so with tea in hand and chocolate nearby, I finally sit down and have a chance to write a little bit.

We are very much enjoying our “new” house.  Aaron had 7 wonderful days off to help us move in and get settled, and the move went very smoothly.  What a luxury to have someone else pack and carry all our stuff!  Unpacking has gone much more quickly than I expected, and we’re settling in very nicely.  I will post pictures of the house soon, but we’re not quite camera-ready yet.   For now, the boys are having a blast playing with all the packing paper!!

It was hard to send Aaron back to Yakima to finish up residency, but after this long 2-week stretch, we will see him every weekend until he finally graduates at the end of June.

I am definitely feeling the “3rd-trimester fatigue” creeping up on me . . . or maybe it’s the move, taking care of 2 boys on my own, and the restless nights as kids adjust to a new environment . . . hmmm – either way, I’m exhausted.

Also, we just found out that the hospital here in Walla Walla does not allow any VBAC births.  This news was very difficult to hear – I had my heart set on a smooth, easy, home-town birth this time around, and that’s just not going to happen now.  I had a few very rough days as I struggled with the news – the emotions and trauma of Matthew’s C-section came rushing back to me in vivid detail, and I simply can’t bear to go through any part of that again.  Granted, Matthew’s C-section was more traumatic than most, but I still can’t put myself through another major surgery unnecessarily.  (more on that subject later.)  So, it looks like we will have to temporarily move back to Yakima for this baby’s birth.  I have been blessed with two wonderful OB doctors, one here and one in Yakima, who are willing to cooperate on this, and who both agree that I’m a perfect VBAC candidate.  (My doctor here in Walla Walla said he would definitely do it, if the hospital allowed him to.)  When I reach my 38th week (toward the end of August), the kids and I will move back to Yakima and “hang out” until I go into labor.  Aaron will have to stay in Walla Walla to work, but when it looks like I’m in labor he will (safely, I hope) drive to Yakima and hopefully get there in time for his 3rd son’s birth.  The logistics will be difficult, and we will definitely count on our Yakima “support system” for help agan! -  but I am willing to do whatever it takes to avoid a 2nd C-section.  I’m very disappointed that the whole thing won’t be as smooth and easy as we were hoping for, but I’m more at peace with the situation now than when I first heard the news.

There is a lot more to write about, but my tea is gone, my chocolate was yummy, and now, it’s bed-time.

Was it really only a year ago?

My little Matthew,

Just one short year ago, you were such a different baby.

You were so sick, so fragile, and just didn’t have the energy to do much at all – including eat for yourself.  Yet, your smile was so sweet, and your eyes sparkled with a life that we loved more than you’ll ever know.  The fact that your future was so uncertain broke our hearts.

But, one year ago today, that all changed.  On May 7, 2008, a skilled surgeon repaired your heart – a day I once feared and dreaded, but now I will always treasure.  You sailed through the surgery, recovered more quickly than we ever thought possible, and immediately embraced life with fantastic energy and vigor.  You have come so far in the past year, that it is hard to believe it has only been 12 short months.

Now, look at you!

oops – where did you go?

Oh!  There you are!

You are constantly on-the go, walking (working on running!), climbing, playing, laughing, and getting into whatever kind of trouble you can find.

You immediately win over every person you meet, earning lots of laughs by showing your muscles.

Matthew showing off his "muscles" with a friend

Your sense of humor is fantastic, and you love making others laugh.

You can communicate many things to us, using sign language to tell us when you are hungry or thirsty, want more or are all done, or want to take a bath.  You also sign and say “Da-da,” and you have a special place in your heart for your daddy and your grandpa.  It is fitting that one of your first words was “Pa-pa.”  You will say “Ma-ma,” but only if you are upset and really need something from me!

Your favorite games are peek-a-boo, chasing me and your big brother, tickle-time and blowing raspberries, pulling all the books off the shelf, and, of course, laughing at silly boy-noises.  You adore your big brother, and can make a game out of just about anything with him.

And, best of all, you are healthy.  For a year now, you haven’t needed anything more than an occasional antibiotic for an ear infection.  We only see your cardiologist once a year for a check-up, and we don’t fear for your life when you get an cough or cold.  You have come so far from the baby who was only expected to live a few hours – you are such a miracle!

You truly are a blessing and  joy, and I am so grateful that God gave us YOU.  Thank you, Lord, and to You be the Glory!

We love you so much,

Mommy & Daddy

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Today is also a “new beginning” for our family, as we move into our first house!  If you are feeling nostalgic (or are just curious) what happened one year ago, the day Matthew’s heart was surgically repaired, you can check out the archives for May 2008, or follow these links to my posts from that day:

• Admitted
• 7:15 am
• 9:05 am
• Cardiologist update 9:25 am
• 10:30 am update
• 11:24 am – Off the machine
• 11:50 am – “Beautiful Result”
• 1:00 pm – Done with Surgery

20-week Ultrasound Report – It’s a Boy!

Mostly good news . . . but mostly wasn’t what I was hoping for.  I was really wanting a “perfect” ultrasound report with this baby.

We were with the same technician, and in the same room that we were in when we first learned about Matthew’s heart problems.  This time, though, Aaron was with me.  The ultrasound tech is very good, and was extremely patient with my barrage of questions as she scanned the baby head-to-toe.  “Did you see a clear nasal bone?  Does the lip and palate look o.k.?  How are the long bones measuring compared to gestational age?”  She reassuringly answered every question, confirming that everything looked fine.  She took time to show us clear heart pictures – four good-looking chambers, balanced in size and pumping just the way they should.

“Did you get a good look at both kidneys?  Does the umbilical cord look good?  Could you see all the vessels?  Oh – it’s a boy!”  Again, she answered “yes” to every question.

When she started to look at his legs and feet, she got quiet for a minute, and started taking a bunch of pictures.  I saw exactly what she was looking at.  “He has a club foot, doesn’t he?”  Her silence was my confirmation.  I had seen enough of Matthew’s ultrasounds, with his 2 club feet, to know what we were seeing.

Our ultrasound was a week ago, but I still have so many mixed feelings.  I am relieved and grateful that this little guy looks healthy – everything looked great except for his little left foot.  I’m still trying to see things realistically, put things in perspective, but it is still very hard to hear that something, anything, is “wrong” with your baby – no matter how “small.”

We have a lot of reasons to be optimistic:

• -it’s just a foot – not a heart, brain, kidney, etc.
• -it’s fixable, often without surgery.
• -Matthew’s “club feet” showed up on every ultrasound, but had self-corrected by 6 months of age.
• -My mom and I can both invert our left feet into the “club feet” position with no problem whatsoever.  Flexible feet just run in our family.  It’s possible that this baby just has his mom’s funky left foot, and I’ve done just fine aside from a little pigeon-toed teasing.

But, I still have my worries:

• -What if it is a “real” club foot that does need casting or surgery?  I know that it’s not as big as open-heart surgery, but I’m not sure that what we went through with Matthew makes this any easier to deal with, or takes away from the fact that it will still be difficult, especially with 2 other little boys to care for at the same time?
• -What if it is just my hereditary “flexible foot,” but doctors pressure us into casting anyway?  What if we torture this child with casts and orthotics unnecessarily?
• -What if it’s not “just a foot”?

Once again, I’m asking for your prayers.

Moved Out, but not yet moved in.

It has been a busy couple weeks!

Last week, we were very busy getting ready for the movers to come, getting Aaron packed up for 2 months “away,” and the kids and I ready for 2 weeks in-between houses.  The movers arrived last Thursday to pack everything, then they loaded the truck on Friday.  Micah was pretty excited about the big, orange moving truck, and Aaron and I were incredibly grateful to not have to do all of the packing and moving ourselves!  There was enough work to do as it was!

Our last week in Yakima was filled with lots of visits with (and help from!) our good friends.  As excited as we are about this move, it is really hard to leave our Yakima “family.”  We are going to miss you all so much!  Our Walla Walla home will be ready to welcome guests soon, and we hope you will come visit us often.

The moving truck arrives in Walla Walla on Thursday to move us into our new house.  Meanwhile, we’ve spent some time with family in Yakima, getting all of the loose-ends tied up there and spending some time with Aaron, before the kids and I headed to WW to stay with my parents for the rest of the week.  It is going to be hard to be away from Daddy for 2 months, but we will visit often.  He finishes residency the end of June, and then we will enjoy a wonderful July together as a family before he starts his new position in Walla Walla the 1st of August.

The kids are having a great time at Grandma and Grandpa’s house, like always, and I have been able to catch an afternoon nap with the kids the last couple days!  These next weeks will be exciting and busy, too, but I will post when I can.

Micah’s Weather Report

Tuesday: Winter! Snow storm with enough snow in the back yard to make footprints, then lots of rain, then thunder and hail.

Wednesday: Summer! 65-degrees, and I’m ready for it with my new swim-suit!

A Conversation with Micah

“Mommy, is Matthew our new baby?”

“No, honey.  Matthew is getting big.  We’re going to have another new baby!”

“Yeah.  A new baby instead of Matthew.”

“No, we are going to have a new baby and Matthew.  We get to have both!”

“Oh.  both.  Sorry, I misunderstood.”

Brothers

About a week ago, Matthew was playing with the “Tigger Airplane,” a toy that’s been a hit ever since Micah received it for his 1st birthday (Thanks, B & K!)  I noticed that he was wearing the same jammies Micah wore when we took pictures of him, so I got out the camera.  I needed to get a video of Matthew walking with it anyway!

I think they look like brothers . . . .

Enjoy!

November, 2006

March, 2009

Here is a video of both boys, still wearing the same jammies, enjoying the Tigger Airplane.  Matthew walks runs all over the house with it!

This and That

1.

Micah’s hearing is much improved.  Thank you all for the prayers!  It appears that the fluid behind his ear drums was the culprit, and now that it has started to drain, he can hear us again.  We will have his hearing officially tested just to make sure everything is o.k., but I can’t tell you how relieved I am that it doesn’t look like he will have permanent hearing loss.  Thank You, Lord!!

2.

I lost my cell phone about a week ago . . . so if you’ve tried to call and I haven’t returned your call, I’m sorry!  We have new cell phones now – same numbers, but AT&T instead of Verizon.  (Yes, Aaron finally got his iphone, and loves it!)  However, I lost all my contact numbers when I lost the phone!  So, I’m asking a favor.  If you are someone who I call, (or if you would like me to call you!),  could you please either call me with your phone number or send me a quick email?  I would greatly appreciate it.

3.

I felt our new baby move for the first time last night!  Such a tiny little flutter, but definitely our baby moving.

4.

If you are in the Yakima area and pick up a copy of  Playdate magazine, you might see a familiar face.  Matthew won the “Gotcha” photo contest for the latest issue!  Click here to see him and other Photo contest winners, including our Godson, Jackson Snow, who was the winner for the last issue  You are such a cutie, Matthew!!

The Winning Photo

Prayers for Micah

Micah is having a lot of trouble hearing.  He can’t hear a normal speaking voice, and has even more trouble if there is background noise.  At first, I was very frustrated with him because I thought he was ignoring me every time I talked to him, but it became clear that he truly isn’t hearing.

His ears are not obviously infected, but it does look like there is fluid behind his ear drums.  So, we’re treating him as if he has ear infections, and hoping his hearing will return to normal if we can clear up the fluid.

However, I can’t help but worry about my little guy.  I have two uncles and a cousin who all suffered permanent hearing loss after having a viral illness with a fever.  Please keep him in your prayers.  He’s my healthy guy, and this makes me realize how much I count on and need him to stay that way.

Aaron is still pretty sick, but thankfully the pneumonia and influenza tests were all negative.  His fevers have let up some, but he has to work another 30-hour shift today, so say a prayer for him, too.  He only has one more week of this awful rotation, then he’ll be able to get some rest.

Thanks for the prayers.

World Down Syndrome Day

Today is World Down Syndrome Day.  The date, 3/21, represents 3 copies of the 21st chromosome.

It comes at a great time this year, in light of the President’s recent faux pas.  (By the way, the best response to this that I have seen is from Sarah, an expert bowler and an eloquent blogger, who just happens to have 3 copies of her 21st chromosome.)

Down syndrome was named after Dr. John Langdon Down, who first described the condition.  The correct terminology is just that:  Down syndrome.  Not Down’s, or Down’s Syndrome, because Dr. Down did not have the condition (so we do not use the possessive form,) and “syndrome” is not capitalized because it is not a proper noun.  You may also see Down syndrome abbreviated online as DS or Ds.

Down syndrome is the most common chromosomal anomaly, occurring in approximately 1 in 733 births in the US.  However, as common as it is, there are less and less babies being born with the condition, because about 92-93% of mothers who receive a prenatal diagnosis of Ds choose to abort the baby.  This comes to about 65,000+ babies aborted each year due to a prenatal diagnosis.  I can’t tell you how much it saddens me that so many lives are lost.  I am sad not only for the babies, but also for the parents who are missing out on having an amazing child.  And, I am sad for Matthew, who will have less friends who are like him.  With fewer people having the condition, others will know less about it, there will be fewer resources for him and less research done about Ds.

When speaking about someone with Down syndrome (or really any other
disability), parents and individuals with the condition prefer it if you put the person first.  For example, “Matthew has Down syndrome.”  We would never say, “Our Down syndrome son,” because that lets the condition define him.  By now, you should know that Down syndrome definitely does not define our son, nor does it define any other person who has an extra 21st chromosome.  Each individual is just that . . . an individual, which is why we also avoid making “blanket” statements about people with Down syndrome.  Statements such as “They are always so happy,” are not only untrue, but offensive because they lump everyone with the condition into one category.  To be safe, just avoid statements that start with “They are . . . “.  I’ve come to really dislike the royal “they.”  Are we too picky?  Too sensitive?  I don’t think so.  As parents, we have to protect and stand up for our children.  Words are powerful, so we need to be careful how we use them.

By the way, there are over 200 families on a waiting list, wanting to adopt a child with Down syndrome.  If you think these children are not wanted, you are very, very wrong.  There are families waiting to welcome and love a little one with an extra chromosome.

We love you, Matthew, and wouldn’t trade you for the world!